ITHACA, NY – Cornell freshman Arnold Gimmelstein spent most of Wednesday, March 5 utterly confused. The freshman bio major, who woke believing Wednesday to be an ordinary day, was surprised when he saw hundreds of students with black marks on their foreheads. Sources say that Gimmelstein asked most of his friends what the reason was, however, none were able to discern the nature of the markings. Gimmelstein, who often finds himself in the company of Jewish friends, remained completely oblivious to the fact that the marks were ashes and part of the Catholic faith’s Ash Wednesday ceremony.
In light of this confusion, Gimmelstein and his friends deduced that the black marks were part of a protest or campaign akin to to wearing ribbons to support a cause. Gimmelstein told CU Nooz “I couldn’t figure out what the marks were but I’m guessing they were supporting AIDS patients or cancer research, like the new Livestrong or something.” Wanting to participate in the protest, Gimmelstein used a sharpie on his forehead to match his peers. As of press time, Gimmelstein has been seen urging his friends to do the same while explaining that “they should do their part to support the Ukraine.”