Visiting Class of 2019 Egregiously Mislead by Weekend’s Weather

ARTS QUAD – Hundreds of potential new students visited Cornell’s campus this weekend only to have an absolutely misleading impression of what the climate is like.

“It’s so beautiful here! I can’t wait to start here in the fall and do all my work on the Arts Quad,” described Julia Nichols ‘19, a chump of the worst variety who has no idea what she has gotten herself into.

“I just bought a light sweater at the Cornell Store that I’ll be able to wear year round. I’ll go to the farmer’s market every Saturday with my friends. I’m sure I won’t be working on weekends.”

At press time, Nichols decided that she wouldn’t even bring her winter coat when coming up for school in the fall.

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