BECKER HALL – Half an hour after putting away all of his clothes and saying goodbye to his parents, Kent Shanahan ’18 reportedly pulled his guitar out and just started jamming outside of his room, assuming it to be the coolest activity he could think of.
“I used to play clarinet, but then I realized how cool it was to play guitar in a hallway. I’ve only been playing for two years, but it’s no big deal. I guess I’m just naturally gifted,” rambled an egotistical Shanahan to nobody in particular as annoyed residents walked by.
“Ah, I see you’ve noticed my guitar. Her name is Veronica, and while I play her metal strings, she plays my heartstrings,” announced the self-righteous sophomore to the handful of uninterested students sitting at a nearby table.
It was later reported that Shanahan seemed intent on playing “Wonderwall” by Oasis over and over again while testing out his falsetto range.