Real-Life Ninja Sneaks into Class Twenty Minutes Late

IVES HALL — Materializing in the third row of the lecture hall without the professor even noticing, ILR student and real-life ninja Brian Eriksson ’18 managed to sneak undetected into class twenty minutes late.

“I didn’t even see him coming into the room, but he definitely wasn’t there for the first half of the lecture. There’s no way any normal student, unskilled in the art of ninjutsu, could have pulled that off so stealthily,” said classmate Jessica Harvey ’18, who swears she saw some blurry masked figure whoosh into class out of the corner of her eye.

“I never saw him in class, but I assumed he was hiding in the shadows or tucked away behind a wall somewhere. Who really knows what else he’s capable of?” continued Harvey, as she observed Eriksson making mystical symbols with his hands underneath his desk, probably texting.

Sources report the student did not even take notes during lecture and must be using his ninja powers to do reasonably well in the course.

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