FOREST HOME — Weeks after leaving their hometowns, an unprecedented number of reinvigorated students have surprised staff with an overflowing enthusiasm to train and learn, striving to be the very best, like no one ever was.
Faculty report record high class attendance and engagement, as more students than ever have been taking pictures of lecture slides with their phones, muttering “Gotta catch ‘em all.”
“It’s a reminder that Cornell truly inspires everyone here,” said Human Ecology Professor Samuel Oak, proud of his students’ boosted morale. “It’s so rewarding to be able to teach the best and brightest in their journey through the Ivy League.”
Young adults have also shown a greater desire to go outside, jumping into bushes and wading through Beebe Lake, encouraging one another in a quest to level themselves up.
“These kids are running around pointing to roses and skunk cabbages, taking pictures, screaming ‘Bulbasaur! Pikachu!’” commented groundskeeper Tim Gaines. “I reckon they’re Plant Science majors, is ‘Bulbasaur’ a scientific name?”
Oak optimistically predicted that if these Youngsters continue to become fiercer competitors with every challenge along their academic careers, they will someday become Masters.