Finally, My Girlfriend and I Can Have The Uninterrupted Four-Day Fuck Session We’ve Been Waiting For

Thanks to Fall Break, my girlfriend and I are finally gonna have that bombin’ four-day non-stop bang session we’ve been waiting for.

Everyone else is getting a bus ticket to New York. Me and Jennifer? Well we’ve got a bus ticket on a one way, ninety six hour ride to bangtown, nonstop. Campus is empty, but you better believe Jennifer’s not.

Dining halls are closed? No problemo. We’re not even breaking for food or water on our all-day-every-day thrusting marathon this Columbus Day weekend. You know damn well what the only thing I’m eating is.

We could spend this entire weekend watching Netflix like some people, but instead we’re cutting ourselves off from social media. No Snapchat, Facebook, E-mail, or Linkedin. We’re even temporarily cutting off all ties with our friends and family, so we can focus on performing well during the endurance-testing, animalistic experience that we’re gonna have. No way are we burning all our internet allowance on music or TV this break when we can fuck ’til our friends come home.

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