May 17, 2017

Senior Deployed For Final Tour Of Catharine Valley Winery

SCHWARTZ CENTER—Bidding a tearful goodbye to his mother and father, Harry Landry ‘17 shipped out for his final call in Upstate New York vineyards.

“I knew what I was signing up for when I was recruited during rush week freshman year,” said Landry as he took one last look at his family. “It’s my duty to increase the social standing of the house in any way I can.”

Thousands of Cornellians each year are shipped across county lines to confront perilous hazards such as dense canopies of vines and large swaths of rowdy aggressors in pastel clothing.

“I’ve seen some unspeakable horrors that will be etched in memory forever, from a freshman cursing out the owner over a fake ID to puddles of vomit rolling down a children’s school bus,” added Landry.

Despite arriving home several hours ago, Landry continued to suffer from post traumatic stresses such as nausea, memory loss, and a pounding headache.

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