Alright, I’ve heard a lot about your RA. How he cuts through all the bullshit, skips the ice breakers, and is just down to have a good time. But if he’s so cool, then does he have the power to bring back my deceased father?
I mean sure, he tells you where all the cool parties are at and even takes y’all out to Collegetown for the occasional Insomnia run, but will any of that bring my strong, paternal figure back from his grave down at Locust Grove Cemetery? Maybe your RA even bought alcohol for you, but that’s nothing compared to if he had bought my father, who is no longer with us, a new lease on life.
I’m sure your RA is really helping you get settled into how things work around here at Cornell, but until he can help my dad get settled into the realm of the living, I don’t really wanna hear about it.