LIBE SLOPE—Among the thousands of enthusiastic attendees ready to partake in the Slope Day festivities is Daniel Sebastian ‘22, whose only motivation for showing up is the wholesome and thorough consumption of music.
“You don’t need drugs or alcohol to enjoy EDM, especially not during the daytime,” said Sebastian. “I can’t wait to sing all the words to my favorite Steve Aoki song ‘MIC Drop (feat. Desiigner) [Steve Aoki Remix]’.”
Daniel plans to begin his Slope Day pregame by waking up at 7am, cracking open a cold bottle of orange juice, and getting in the mood by quietly shuffling a playlist of his three favorite artists of time: Steve Aoki, EZI, and Cousin Stizz. He then plans to arrive early so he won’t have to squeeze through the crowd to be just the right distance from the speakers for “the best acoustic experience.”
“He’s been talking about ‘Neon Future 1’ and ‘I’m in the House’ (feat. Zuper Blahq), all week,” said Daniel’s roomate Michael Wills ‘22. “I honestly couldn’t care who plays Slope Day. I’ll probably be too drunk to even know there’s music playing.”
Daniel says all the Slope Day excitement he’s feeling now makes him want to join the Slope Day Committee one day so that he too could hire the perfect musician with the rare ability to get students pumped about an enormous concert and daylong binge-drinking.
Related Posts
Student Receives Journal and Therapy, Stops Writing for Daily Sun Opinion Section
Evil Professor To Teach All Classes in Your Major, Minor, and Distribution Requirements Next Semester
Unhoused Sophomore Unable to Sing Along to Flo Rida’s “My House”
Ann Coulter Rejects Freedom of Expression Ice Cream Flavor, Argues It Has “Too Much Chocolate”
Like This!
