sibley hall—-i mean yeah because it’s almost finals week i’m a little extra stressed out right now but my doctor and also all my professors and friends and family are exaggerating things a little like yeah obviously i haven’t been sleeping or eating all that much and my breathing pattern has settled into permanent hyperventilation but it’s not that big a deal hahahaha i’m just locked in you know i’m locked in and i have a lot of work to do but i’m good things are good and i definitely don’t have any underlying health issues or anything why would you say that have people been saying that?
yeah like my chest is tight all the time and sometimes it gets hard to breathe but everyone gets that plus it’s probably just because i’ve only had celsius to drink and or eat for the past three days i know i should take better care of myself i just have a lot of stuff to get done i do feel bad that i’m not doing enough for my health but going to the gym stresses me out like what if i go and i look stupid or one of the machines suddenly decides to break while i’m under it and i get flattened like a pancake i can’t take that chance i’m just not gonna go also i think my friends hate me they say they don’t but that’s what they have to say nobody is gonna be like “oh yeah i hate you” when you ask if you hate them so i can’t even really believe them when they tell me they don’t i’m just being annoying ignore all of this things are good
i wanna make sure i understand all the material on my final there’s a topic i really don’t get i would go to office hours but i don’t feel like my questions are like office hours worthy if you know what i mean like i don’t want to waste anyone’s time i know the TAs get paid to answer questions or whatever i just don’t want to inconvenience anyone or even be noticed frankly oh my shoulders are up at my ears i know there’s a lot going on but i also remembered my loved ones will die one day too so that’s kinda stressing me out nobody is currently in the hospital or anything it’s just something i think about a lot
i need to unclench my jaw i’m trying to but now i’m thinking about unclenching it and clenching harder oh i think i got it oh nvm now i’m tensing my neck i need to relax im trying to relax it’s not working i think i am unlovable
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