Tag Archives: Crime

Report: My Mom Really Worried About Recent Ithaca Armed Robberies

SOUTH BEND, INDIANA—After reading some articles about January’s armed robberies across Ithaca, my mom is reportedly pretty afraid that the thief may threaten my safety at Cornell. “Hey, I’m checking in to make sure you’re doing okay,” my mom texted me last Sunday, presumably worried that the criminal may break Read More

BREAKING: Investigators Almost Certain Graffiti Vandal an Asshole

Overheard at Cornell, Daily Sun

ITHACA — After looking into the prevalence of graffiti on the Cornell main campus, investigators from the Ithaca Police Department are almost certain the vandal, who has been defacing school property with communist propaganda, is an asshole. “We had our suspicions that this hoodlum was an asshole back in November Read More