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February 27, 2026
  • Hateful Professor Asks Question on Reading No One Read
  • Biology Major Slinks Sheepishly Out of Lab, One Rat Heavier
  • A.D. White Professor-At-Large Finally Apprehended
  • Student Assembly Threatens Competence
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    21 hours ago21 hours ago
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October 26, 2023

  • Student Life

Hordes of Soulless Undead Converge at Morgan Stanley Networking Session

Nooz Staff2 years ago2 years ago04 mins

STATLER HALL–Many were gripped by shock and awe today as what looked to be a procession of animated undead corpses made their way across central campus. Upon further investigation by campus officials, it seemed that the would-be arbiters of Armageddon turned out to be attending an investment banking information session. A witness to the ghastly…

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