“Close Enough” Match Pairs Hundreds of Proximity-Based Situationships
NORTH CAMPUS—Each February, thousands of Cornellians participate in the Perfect Match survey in an effort…
“Close Enough” Match Pairs Hundreds of Proximity-Based Situationships
NORTH CAMPUS—Each February, thousands of Cornellians participate in the Perfect Match survey in an effort to find true love based on shared interests, similarities, and preferences. This year, students have the opportunity to receive a match that is, like, close enough. Close Enough Match is a student-led project team that utilizes machine learning to pair…
Trendy Multicolored Scarf No Match for Arctic Windchill
ARTS QUAD—Throughout Upstate New York, arctic blast weather patterns have produced extreme outdoor conditions, subzero windchills, and heavy winter precipitation. The dangerously low temperatures have forced students across campus to deploy advanced protective gear: trendy little multicolored scarves. “On one hand, the Real Feel is -30 degrees,” reasoned Eileen Martin ‘28. “On the other, I…
“Reject The Evidence of Your Eyes and Ears” and 8 Other Guidelines From the Presidential Task Force on Institutional Voice
DAY HALL—Cornell’s Presidential Task Force on Institutional Voice issued its final recommendations for the University on February 5. Formed in March of last year, the Task Force aimed to codify expectations for the University’s official response to political issues.
Top 10 Addresses of Daily Sun Writers
ITHACA, N.Y. — I’m no address connoisseur, but I’ve always been an avid fan of the Cornell Daily Sun’s journalism. Ever since I opened my first newspaper, I’ve developed an unhealthy addiction to their integrity, professionalism, and of course, their relevant reporting. To express my appreciation, I decided to rank the top 10 addresses of…
Okenshields Fork Crust Applauded for Contributions to Biodiversity Research
OKENSHIELDS—In a discovery that shocked the Cornell scientific community, researcher Monica Pondey found the Ecology department’s next major breakthrough as it was mere seconds away from being plunged into her Friday lunch. “Based on the color or texture I was about to eat either mac and cheese, stir fry, or soup,” recalled Pondey. “Nevertheless, inspiration…
Professor Adds Epstein Files Acknowledgement to Email Signature
ITHACA, NY—On Monday morning, Samuel Whitmore ’27, a student in Professor Daniel Sarver’s Ethics in Business course, noticed something different when he received an email from his professor. Near the close of the message, students were met with an additional paragraph between Sarver’s office location and the university’s standard land acknowledgement. “I live and work…
Report: No Way Ice Cream Hard Enough to Justify How Long Guy Ahead of You Has Been Scooping
FLORA ROSE HOUSE—After taking several minutes to reach the front of the ice cream line at a busy dinner Sunday night, Sarah Weinberger ‘28 was forced to wait further as the patron in front of her took what experts are calling an “unjustifiably long” time to get his dessert. “It was terrible. He just kept…
