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“Yeah I Was in the Hood,” Says Rich White Biology Student Misleadingly Talking About Fume Hood
Inconsiderate Asshole With No Concept of Personal Space Sits Within 5 Seats of You in Lecture Hall
Inhabitants of Local Valley Starting to Regret Construction of Hole-in-the-wall Restaurant in Hydroelectric Dam
Tompkins County DA Relieved to Go Back to Dismissing Other Cases
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“Yeah I Was in the Hood,” Says Rich White Biology Student Misleadingly Talking About Fume Hood
Inconsiderate Asshole With No Concept of Personal Space Sits Within 5 Seats of You in Lecture Hall
Inhabitants of Local Valley Starting to Regret Construction of Hole-in-the-wall Restaurant in Hydroelectric Dam
Tompkins County DA Relieved to Go Back to Dismissing Other Cases
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • CU NoozMagazine
    • Spring 2026 Issue
    • Spring 2025 Issue
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
Headlines

“Yeah I Was in the Hood,” Says Rich White Biology Student Misleadingly Talking About Fume Hood

12 hours ago12 hours ago

Inconsiderate Asshole With No Concept of Personal Space Sits Within 5 Seats of You in Lecture Hall

2 days ago2 days ago

Inhabitants of Local Valley Starting to Regret Construction of Hole-in-the-wall Restaurant in Hydroelectric Dam

3 days ago3 days ago
matty van hooty

Tompkins County DA Relieved to Go Back to Dismissing Other Cases

3 days ago3 days ago

Kotlikoff Also Wondering What Action Cornell Administration Will Take

4 days ago4 days ago

Splitsies! Group Assignment Done By Just You

1 week ago1 week ago

CUPD Claims K-9 Ate Report

1 week ago1 week ago

Biology Major Stressed About Answers to Pre-Limbs 

1 week ago1 week ago

Only Minority in Friend Group Already Knows Who She Going to Be

11 months ago11 months ago

Ambitious Group Project Member Needs To Take The Fucking Hint

12 months ago12 months ago
  • Home
  • 2014
  • February
  • 19

February 19, 2014

  • Uncategorized

Student Assembly Vice President Connivingly Narrates All of Her Actions Out Loud

Nooz Staff13 years ago13 years ago01 mins

ITHACA, NY – In an action that has confused friends and family alike, Student Assembly vice president Sarah Balik has begun reasoning all of her thoughts out loud, often employing obscure metaphors. “The thing about swine is that they always seem to love the muck they live in. Why wouldn’t they? It’s all they know….

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