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February 5, 2026
  • Okenshields Fork Crust Applauded for Contributions to Biodiversity Research
  • Professor Adds Epstein Files Acknowledgement to Email Signature
  • Report: No Way Ice Cream Hard Enough to Justify How Long Guy Ahead of You Has Been Scooping
  • Cornell Engineering Debuts ‘This Is What A David Duffield Looks Like’ Shirt
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  • Okenshields Fork Crust Applauded for Contributions to Biodiversity Research

    11 hours ago11 hours ago
  • Professor Adds Epstein Files Acknowledgement to Email Signature

    2 days ago2 days ago
  • Report: No Way Ice Cream Hard Enough to Justify How Long Guy Ahead of You Has Been Scooping

    3 days ago3 days ago
  • Birder Aboard Doomed Plane Gleefully Identifies Species of Goose Flying Into Engine

    11 months ago11 months ago
  • Whoa, Buster! Bundle of Big Sporty Fellows in Dining Hall Sure Are Hungry

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  • Pope Sick

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September 3, 2014

  • Cornell

Lab of Ornithology Closes After Scientists Learn Everything About Birds

Nooz Staff11 years ago02 mins

In a statement released last Monday, The Cornell Lab of Ornithology announced that its researchers have learned everything there is to know about birds and would be shutting down all operations indefinitely. “Birds are very simple creatures. We know that their hollow bones and feathers help them fly, and that they use their beaks to…

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  • Cornell

OP-ED: Welcome to Cornell! I’m the Sheriff ‘Round These Parts

Nooz Staff11 years ago04 mins

By Cornell Police Chief Kathy Zoner Howdy partner! I didn’t see you wander into town. Nice day for it though…mighty nice day. Whelp, since you’re new here I figured I’d introduce myself and let you know that I’m the sheriff ‘round these parts. No cause for alarm, stranger!  If you don’t start any trouble we…

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