September 4, 2014

Cornell

Freemasons to Recruit New Members at ClubFest This Weekend

Nooz Staff12 years ago12 years ago02 mins

Ithaca, NY — In an unexpected decision, for the first time ever, the Freemasons will be recruiting members at Cornell’s club fest this fall! The centuries-old secret society says it hopes to provide a fun, safe atmosphere for discussions related to history, philosophy and religion. “Those of able body and mind, we ask of thee….do…

Unemployed “Arts Quad Kid” Thinking About Reading on Law School Quad

Nooz Staff12 years ago12 years ago02 mins

ITHACA, NY — Unemployed recent graduate Ethan Joseph ‘14, best known as “the Arts Quad kid” for regularly sitting on the southwest corner of the Arts Quad in all weather, reading and smiling at passers-by, is reportedly considering returning to school and reading on one of the nation’s law school quads. “I guess my time at Cornell,…

Heartwarming! Cornell Sun Writer Not Sure What “News” Is, Publishes Article About Their Tuesday

He is Risen! Student Who Spent Spring Break in Alcoholic Stupor Miraculously Attends 9 AM Lecture

“What Are You Talking About? Slope Day Just Happened”: Administration Tries New Tactic After Failing to Source Replacement Artist

Two Birds, One Stone! Jerry from Craigslist Booked as Slope Day Headliner, Convocation Speaker

Circle of Elders Regales Freshmen With Stories of the Before-Times When the Clocktower Was Free

Girl Power! Group of Girlies Take Elevator Up to 7th Floor of Olin

September 4, 2014

Freemasons to Recruit New Members at ClubFest This Weekend

Unemployed “Arts Quad Kid” Thinking About Reading on Law School Quad