September 4, 2014

Cornell

Freemasons to Recruit New Members at ClubFest This Weekend

Nooz Staff11 years ago11 years ago02 mins

Ithaca, NY — In an unexpected decision, for the first time ever, the Freemasons will be recruiting members at Cornell’s club fest this fall! The centuries-old secret society says it hopes to provide a fun, safe atmosphere for discussions related to history, philosophy and religion. “Those of able body and mind, we ask of thee….do…

Unemployed “Arts Quad Kid” Thinking About Reading on Law School Quad

Nooz Staff11 years ago11 years ago02 mins

ITHACA, NY — Unemployed recent graduate Ethan Joseph ‘14, best known as “the Arts Quad kid” for regularly sitting on the southwest corner of the Arts Quad in all weather, reading and smiling at passers-by, is reportedly considering returning to school and reading on one of the nation’s law school quads. “I guess my time at Cornell,…

A.D. White Professor-At-Large Finally Apprehended

Student Assembly Threatens Competence

“Unfortunately, We Had Many Qualified Candidates,” Sings A Capella Group At 2am Outside Your Window

Coefficient of Kinetic Friction Between You and Gray Slush Says Eat Shit Nerd

Bing Chilling? February Break Spent Celebrating Chinese New Year In Auspicious Binghamton Getaway

“Close Enough” Match Pairs Hundreds of Proximity-Based Situationships

September 4, 2014

Freemasons to Recruit New Members at ClubFest This Weekend

Unemployed “Arts Quad Kid” Thinking About Reading on Law School Quad