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March 22, 2026
  • Op-Ed: Oops! Not All That Depression was Seasonal
  • Lab Partner Swears “It Feels Better Without Gloves”
  • Op-Ed: My Candle Ritual Would Have Made My Situationship Like Me Back If the Fire Inspection Guys Hadn’t Confiscated It
  • Student at Palantir Event Offended By Implication They Support Palantir
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  • Op-Ed: Oops! Not All That Depression was Seasonal

    3 days ago3 days ago
  • Lab Partner Swears “It Feels Better Without Gloves”

    4 days ago4 days ago
  • Op-Ed: My Candle Ritual Would Have Made My Situationship Like Me Back If the Fire Inspection Guys Hadn’t Confiscated It

    5 days ago5 days ago
  • Student at Palantir Event Offended By Implication They Support Palantir

    5 days ago5 days ago
  • Short Ginger Friend Hides Box of Edibles at End of Rainbow

    1 week ago1 week ago
  • “It’s 6 O’clock Somewhere”: Upperclassman Begs to Not Pay Bus Fare

    1 week ago1 week ago
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June 2016

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Campus Adds New Dimension to Accommodate Class of 2020

Nooz Staff10 years ago10 years ago02 mins

NORTH CAMPUS — Amidst growing concerns of insufficient student housing, Cornell has announced that a new spatial dimension will be constructed on North Campus to accommodate the incoming class of 2020. “We used to have to force triples and quads in some of the high rises, but recent advances in technology mean that we can fit…

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Hotel School Votes to Leave University in Historic Referendum

Nooz Staff10 years ago10 years ago02 mins

STATLER HALL – In a tightly contested vote held in Statler Auditorium yesterday, the School of Hotel Administration narrowly decided to revoke its membership from Cornell University. The Hotel School had been a member of the CU since 1922, and until recently had largely benefited from economic and political ties to the academic institution. “Membership…

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Sophomore Acing Summer Classes, Failing Summer

Nooz Staff10 years ago10 years ago02 mins

OLIN HALL — Finishing up yet another assignment for his Introduction to Python course, rising sophomore Jordan Noble is acing his summer classes while, at the same time, failing at summer vacation. “The course is going really well, I love the professor and the homeworks are pretty fun!” said Noble as all his peers were…

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Recent Graduates Wondering Who Will Take Initiative to Clean House

Nooz Staff10 years ago10 years ago02 mins

COLLEGETOWN – Following graduation and the departure of the majority of students from the Cornell campus, residents at 531 East State Street have been seen idly walking around their incredibly disgusting house, curious as to which person would be the first to start cleaning. “Our lease ends this weekend, and the house is pretty gross,…

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