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February 27, 2026
  • Hateful Professor Asks Question on Reading No One Read
  • Biology Major Slinks Sheepishly Out of Lab, One Rat Heavier
  • A.D. White Professor-At-Large Finally Apprehended
  • Student Assembly Threatens Competence
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Rising Senior’s Apartment Affordable Firetrap Only Ten Minute Walk From Olin

Nooz Staff9 years ago02 mins

COLLEGETOWN — Junior Jake Evans reported today that the apartment he’d be living in next year was, “An affordable place, close to campus, and virtually impossible to escape in the event of a fire or other emergency.” Chatting with friends over coffee, Evans mentioned that his apartment was likely to become “his tomb,” and that…

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