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October 23, 2025
  • Cornell Announces “Raw Chicken Wednesdays” to Slim Down Large Freshman Class
  • Americans Defeat Fascism by Putting On Greatest Talent Show This Nation Has Ever Seen
  • Mamdani Debates Cuomo As World War I Flying Ace Curtis Sliwa Dogfights Infamous Red Baron
  • Pre-Annotated Library Book Tells Student Exactly What Important
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  • Cornell Announces “Raw Chicken Wednesdays” to Slim Down Large Freshman Class

    22 hours ago22 hours ago
  • Americans Defeat Fascism by Putting On Greatest Talent Show This Nation Has Ever Seen

    23 hours ago23 hours ago
  • Mamdani Debates Cuomo As World War I Flying Ace Curtis Sliwa Dogfights Infamous Red Baron

    3 days ago
  • Pre-Annotated Library Book Tells Student Exactly What Important

    6 days ago6 days ago
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  • Cornell Health Boasts Selective 2% Acceptance Rate for 2025 Appointment Cycle

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OP-ED: Inconsiderate Asshole Is Successful When I Am Not

Nooz Staff4 years ago4 years ago03 mins

In a targeted attack to ruin my life, absolute shitstain Roger Wilhelm ‘22 continues to be successful at literally everything, while I can’t even tie my shoelaces without them coming undone five steps later.  Roger recently announced his internship at Doctors Without Borders, which he only got because his roommate’s aunt’s tennis partner-in-law worked there…

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