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May 21, 2026
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  • “I Overcame a Lot of Diversity to be Here,” Says White Dude in Discussion Section
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November 20, 2013

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Gannett Health Services Distraught to Learn “The Clap” Not Fun Dance Move

Nooz Staff13 years ago12 years ago02 mins

ITHACA, NY — Following an awkward, prolonged encounter with an unfortunate student, staff at Gannett Health Services were surprised and disgusted to learn that “the clap” was not, in fact, “a fun dance move like ‘the twerks’ that all these kids are into,” as reported by one distraught nurse. CU Nooz was on scene as…

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Cornell Student Wonders why Investors haven’t Given him Millions for his “Great Idea for a Start-up”

Nooz Staff13 years ago12 years ago01 mins

“I don’t know where I went wrong,” Grant Zuckerman told Cornell Nooz. Zuckerman, who claimed to have “the next Facebook – a once-in-a-lifetime idea,” was struck by the fact that he was not yet a millionaire. “I thought I did everything right: I came up with a great idea, told all my friends about it,…

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