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Wednesday, October 21, 2026
“I’ll See You In Court”: Student Mistakes CKB Resident’s Invitation As Legal Threat
Morrison Stir-Fry Station Switches to Cup & Ball Scam for Food Pickup
Cornell President Warns Replacing President Would Harm Cornell, Cornell President
Halloween Enthusiast Disappointed by Ithaca Wine & Spirits
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“I’ll See You In Court”: Student Mistakes CKB Resident’s Invitation As Legal Threat
Morrison Stir-Fry Station Switches to Cup & Ball Scam for Food Pickup
Cornell President Warns Replacing President Would Harm Cornell, Cornell President
Halloween Enthusiast Disappointed by Ithaca Wine & Spirits
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • CU NoozMagazine
    • Spring 2026 Issue
    • Spring 2025 Issue
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
Headlines

“I’ll See You In Court”: Student Mistakes CKB Resident’s Invitation As Legal Threat

8 hours ago8 hours ago

Morrison Stir-Fry Station Switches to Cup & Ball Scam for Food Pickup

1 day ago1 day ago

Cornell President Warns Replacing President Would Harm Cornell, Cornell President

1 day ago1 day ago

Halloween Enthusiast Disappointed by Ithaca Wine & Spirits

5 days ago5 days ago

Throbbing Hangover Headache Met With 7:45 A.M. Clocktower Rendition of “Here Comes The Sun”

6 days ago6 days ago

“You Know, Too Much Sleep Is Actually Bad For You,” Student Tells Person-Shaped Bush

1 week ago1 week ago

“Yeah I Was in the Hood,” Says Rich White Biology Student Misleadingly Talking About Fume Hood

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

Inconsiderate Asshole With No Concept of Personal Space Sits Within 5 Seats of You in Lecture Hall

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

Inhabitants of Local Valley Starting to Regret Construction of Hole-in-the-wall Restaurant in Hydroelectric Dam

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago
matty van hooty

Tompkins County DA Relieved to Go Back to Dismissing Other Cases

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago
  • Home
  • 2014
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  • 23

August 23, 2014

  • Cornell

Parents Totally Having Sex In Your Absence

Nooz Staff12 years ago01 mins

WESTCHESTER, NY — Reports indicate that after dropping you off at Cornell to begin a full year of college, your parents immediately took advantage of their now empty  house by having sex in your absence. “Pretty much as soon as we walk in the door,” said your mom, when asked how long it would be until…

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  • Cornell

CU Nooz’s Guide to Finding Parties

Nooz Staff12 years ago02 mins

Finding parties in Collegetown without knowing anyone can be a challenge, and you may not even be able to get in once you find one! But with these helpful tips you’ll be living the college party life in no time: Come by 5:30 to ensure that the party is not yet at capacity. Use thermal…

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  • Cornell

Feral Pack of Freshman Terrorize Collegetown Parties

Nooz Staff12 years ago01 mins

COLLEGETOWN- A roving pack of freshmen numbering somewhere between 15 and 25 was reported around the Collegetown area last night terrorizing parties. Residents are advised to take precautions against the feral creatures, says CUPD representative Trisha Brenning. “Around this time of year, these packs of young adults can easily form when one of them decides…

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