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April 8, 2026
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  • “What Are You Talking About? Slope Day Just Happened”: Administration Tries New Tactic After Failing to Source Replacement Artist

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  • 2014
  • September
  • 24

September 24, 2014

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OP-ED: I’m Not Afraid of You, Punk.

Nooz Staff12 years ago02 mins

By a squirrel. You wanna go, you piece of shit? I’ll do it, man, don’t test me! You think just because I’m a squirrel and you’re an adult human being, I’m afraid of you? I’ll kill you! I’LL KILL YOU! I’ve been the top squirrel around here for months, man. I don’t mess around, and…

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  • Cornell

Both Roommates Waiting for Right Time to Put Up Katy Perry Poster

Nooz Staff12 years ago02 mins

DICKSON HALL- Even after being at school for over a month, sources state that roommates Jesse Turner and Dean Mathers and both still waiting for the right time to put up their respective Katy Perry posters. “I love Katy Perry, that’s for sure. I just don’t want anyone to know,” professed Mathers, who keeps all…

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