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April 2, 2026
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  • “What Are You Talking About? Slope Day Just Happened”: Administration Tries New Tactic After Failing to Source Replacement Artist

    11 months ago
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November 3, 2014

  • Cornell

Freshman Puts Up Hard-Partying Facade for Parents’ Weekend

Nooz Staff11 years ago02 mins

BAUER — Sources are indicating that Jacob Lifflander ’18 spent a considerable amount of time and money this weekend convincing his parents that he has been drinking and partying often while away at college. “I don’t want them to think their tuition money is going to waste,” explained the studious biology major while removing his latest…

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  • Cornell

Girl in Sexy Kitten Costume Rescued by Local Animal Shelter

Nooz Staff11 years ago11 years ago01 mins

COLLEGETOWN- Sources are reporting that the Tompkins County SPCA rescued a stray girl sporting a sexy kitten costume this Friday night. “We found Mittens shivering in a sideways box labeled ‘FREE,’ taking shelter from the rain,” said Jim Bouderau, executive director of the Tompkins County SPCA, while refilling the girl’s saucer of milk. “She was…

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