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March 13, 2026
  • Wikipedia Page of Esteemed Professor Currently Flunking You Not Even, Like, That Long
  • “These Hands Don’t Haze!” Says Frat President Who Used Legs to Kick Shit Out of Pledges
  • Half-Assed Discussion Post Setting Dangerous Precedent For Rest of Semester
  • Local Jester Actually Prefers Fool’s Spring
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  • Wikipedia Page of Esteemed Professor Currently Flunking You Not Even, Like, That Long

    18 hours ago18 hours ago
  • “These Hands Don’t Haze!” Says Frat President Who Used Legs to Kick Shit Out of Pledges

    19 hours ago19 hours ago
  • Half-Assed Discussion Post Setting Dangerous Precedent For Rest of Semester

    2 days ago2 days ago
  • Local Jester Actually Prefers Fool’s Spring

    3 days ago3 days ago
  • Frolicking Squirrel Thinks It’s Funny You Bombed That Prelim

    3 days ago3 days ago
  • Dumb Idiot Bunny Rabbit Doesn’t Know It About to Get Cold Again

    4 days ago4 days ago
  • Home
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  • December

December 2014

  • Cornell

Parents Pressure Skorton to “Get a Real Job” at Thanksgiving Dinner

Nooz Staff11 years ago03 mins

TRENTON, NJ — At his cousins’ house for Thanksgiving dinner Thursday night, President Skorton’s parents allegedly pressured him to “get a real job” and “stop living in fantasy land.” The 65 year-old reportedly got into a heated argument with his mother, Jane, and his father, Richard, about his future before dismissing them altogether and asking…

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  • Cornell

Freshmen Definitely Enjoyed Staying on Campus for Thanksgiving

Nooz Staff11 years ago02 mins

MARY DONLON HALL—While the vast majority of students visited home over Thanksgiving Break, reports confirm that Brian O’Connor (ILR ’18) had a great time staying in his quiet, lonely dorm the past five days. “It probably would’ve been really really nice spend time with my parents, or my dog, or my girlfriend of three years….

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