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Press Secretary’s White House Speedrun Beats Time for Escaping Ives Speedrun
Empty Beer Can Crushed, Devastated
Vote of No Continence? Kotlikoff Shits Pants
Uris Hall Excited to Announce New 0 Ply Toilet Paper
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Press Secretary’s White House Speedrun Beats Time for Escaping Ives Speedrun
Empty Beer Can Crushed, Devastated
Vote of No Continence? Kotlikoff Shits Pants
Uris Hall Excited to Announce New 0 Ply Toilet Paper
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • CU NoozMagazine
    • Spring 2026 Issue
    • Spring 2025 Issue
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
Headlines

Press Secretary’s White House Speedrun Beats Time for Escaping Ives Speedrun

3 days ago3 days ago

Empty Beer Can Crushed, Devastated

3 days ago3 days ago

Vote of No Continence? Kotlikoff Shits Pants

4 days ago4 days ago

Uris Hall Excited to Announce New 0 Ply Toilet Paper

4 days ago4 days ago

“I’ll See You In Court”: Student Mistakes CKB Resident’s Invitation As Legal Threat

5 days ago5 days ago

Morrison Stir-Fry Station Switches to Cup & Ball Scam for Food Pickup

6 days ago6 days ago

Cornell President Warns Replacing President Would Harm Cornell, Cornell President

6 days ago6 days ago

Halloween Enthusiast Disappointed by Ithaca Wine & Spirits

1 week ago1 week ago

Throbbing Hangover Headache Met With 7:45 A.M. Clocktower Rendition of “Here Comes The Sun”

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

“You Know, Too Much Sleep Is Actually Bad For You,” Student Tells Person-Shaped Bush

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago
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June 1, 2015

  • Cornell

“Where’s the Beach?” Asks Terribly Lost Ithaca Tourist

Nooz Staff11 years ago11 years ago01 mins

ITHACA — A horrendously lost man was seen wandering the streets of downtown Ithaca asking locals how to get to the nearest beach. The man was reportedly on vacation in Ithaca with his wife and two children, adamant about swimming in the ocean. “Hey, can you show me where we can catch some waves?” asked…

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