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February 20, 2026
  • “Unfortunately, We Had Many Qualified Candidates,” Sings A Capella Group At 2am Outside Your Window
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  • Bing Chilling? February Break Spent Celebrating Chinese New Year In Auspicious Binghamton Getaway
  • “Close Enough” Match Pairs Hundreds of Proximity-Based Situationships
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August 26, 2016

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Freshman Gives Up On Losing Virginity After Failing to Hook Up During O-Week

Nooz Staff9 years ago02 mins

MEWS HALL– After failing to hook up during his first weekend of college, Freshman Jonny Waters is convinced that he will never fulfill his dream of losing his virginity and will therefore remain celibate for the rest of his life. “I went to a ton of parties, met some girls, but wasn’t able to seal…

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