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Press Secretary’s White House Speedrun Beats Time for Escaping Ives Speedrun
Empty Beer Can Crushed, Devastated
Vote of No Continence? Kotlikoff Shits Pants
Uris Hall Excited to Announce New 0 Ply Toilet Paper
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Press Secretary’s White House Speedrun Beats Time for Escaping Ives Speedrun
Empty Beer Can Crushed, Devastated
Vote of No Continence? Kotlikoff Shits Pants
Uris Hall Excited to Announce New 0 Ply Toilet Paper
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • CU NoozMagazine
    • Spring 2026 Issue
    • Spring 2025 Issue
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
Headlines

Press Secretary’s White House Speedrun Beats Time for Escaping Ives Speedrun

1 day ago1 day ago

Empty Beer Can Crushed, Devastated

1 day ago1 day ago

Vote of No Continence? Kotlikoff Shits Pants

2 days ago2 days ago

Uris Hall Excited to Announce New 0 Ply Toilet Paper

2 days ago2 days ago

“I’ll See You In Court”: Student Mistakes CKB Resident’s Invitation As Legal Threat

3 days ago3 days ago

Morrison Stir-Fry Station Switches to Cup & Ball Scam for Food Pickup

4 days ago4 days ago

Cornell President Warns Replacing President Would Harm Cornell, Cornell President

4 days ago4 days ago

Halloween Enthusiast Disappointed by Ithaca Wine & Spirits

1 week ago1 week ago

Throbbing Hangover Headache Met With 7:45 A.M. Clocktower Rendition of “Here Comes The Sun”

1 week ago1 week ago

“You Know, Too Much Sleep Is Actually Bad For You,” Student Tells Person-Shaped Bush

1 week ago1 week ago
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  • 28

August 28, 2017

  • Uncategorized

Student Eager to Fill Void Left By Game Of Thrones Finale With Binge Drinking

Nooz Staff9 years ago01 mins

COLLEGETOWN—After last night’s explosive Game of Thrones finale, Stanley Climpton ‘19 has announced that he is ready to fill the gaping void left by Game of Thrones’ departure with heavy binge drinking. “Game of Thrones has been such a huge part of my life since the beginning of the show,” Climpton stated while silently unscrewing…

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