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September 24, 2025
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    2 days ago
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February 21, 2025

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“Put Me In, Coach!” Zeus Patron Benched

Nooz Staff7 months ago7 months ago04 mins

TEMPLE OF ZEUS—After airballing an easy shot at one of the marble benches, Junior Varsity Zeus Patron Luka D’Angelo ‘28 was once again relegated to the bench. “Fuck, dude,” grumbled the frustrated freshman, parting a curtain of his bustling competitors to stalk off the court. Having reached his familiar haunt—a particularly uncomfortable wooden bench in…

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