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CTB Barista Announces “Big Fat Chungus Sweetberry Surprise” is Ready at the Bar
Mirror Tired of Hearing “I Am A Unique, Talented Writer” Every Morning From Daily Sun Journalist
Sprint Football Loses to Faster, More Reliable Verizon Football 
Rush Hashanah!: Fraternity Acknowledges High Holidays by Ensuring All Cocaine is Kosher
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CTB Barista Announces “Big Fat Chungus Sweetberry Surprise” is Ready at the Bar
Mirror Tired of Hearing “I Am A Unique, Talented Writer” Every Morning From Daily Sun Journalist
Sprint Football Loses to Faster, More Reliable Verizon Football 
Rush Hashanah!: Fraternity Acknowledges High Holidays by Ensuring All Cocaine is Kosher
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • CU NoozMagazine
    • Spring 2026 Issue
    • Spring 2025 Issue
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
Headlines

CTB Barista Announces “Big Fat Chungus Sweetberry Surprise” is Ready at the Bar

1 day ago1 day ago

Mirror Tired of Hearing “I Am A Unique, Talented Writer” Every Morning From Daily Sun Journalist

2 days ago2 days ago

Sprint Football Loses to Faster, More Reliable Verizon Football 

4 days ago4 days ago
Rush Hashanah

Rush Hashanah!: Fraternity Acknowledges High Holidays by Ensuring All Cocaine is Kosher

6 days ago6 days ago

Mama’s Cleverest Boy Stumped by Strange Clothes-Washing Machine

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

Cornell Republican Sheds Red Nose and Polka Dot Romper, Slinks into Suit for Rare ClubFest Metamorphosis

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

English Department Receives $12 Grant

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

Level B ‘Underage Tuesdays’ Sees Commercial Success, Legal Ramifications

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

Birder Actually Not Sure About That One

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

Professor Spices Up Syllabus With Jokes Like “Attendance is Mandatory”

3 weeks ago2 weeks ago
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November 9, 2025

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Nooz Explains: Trump–Kotlikoff Deal

Nooz Staff11 months ago10 months ago01 mins

Terms of the agreement: Clause I: Carnelian Red MAGA hats to be sold at Cornell Store Clause III: Kotlikoff must trade blue Fruit Roll-Up for banana left in bottom of Trump’s lunch box Clause VI: Touchdown the Bear required to assist in ICE arrests Clause VIII: All University Communications will henceforth and From Now On…

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