Skip to content
March 17, 2026
  • Op-Ed: My Candle Ritual Would Have Made My Situationship Like Me Back If the Fire Inspection Guys Hadn’t Confiscated It
  • Student at Palantir Event Offended By Implication They Support Palantir
  • Short Ginger Friend Hides Box of Edibles at End of Rainbow
  • “It’s 6 O’clock Somewhere”: Upperclassman Begs to Not Pay Bus Fare
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
  • CU NoozMagazine | Spring 2025 Issue
Headlines
  • Op-Ed: My Candle Ritual Would Have Made My Situationship Like Me Back If the Fire Inspection Guys Hadn’t Confiscated It

    11 minutes ago11 minutes ago
  • Student at Palantir Event Offended By Implication They Support Palantir

    17 minutes ago17 minutes ago
  • Short Ginger Friend Hides Box of Edibles at End of Rainbow

    3 days ago3 days ago
  • “It’s 6 O’clock Somewhere”: Upperclassman Begs to Not Pay Bus Fare

    4 days ago4 days ago
  • CTB Declares War on Qahwah House, Fires 300 Espresso Shots

    4 days ago4 days ago
  • Wikipedia Page of Esteemed Professor Currently Flunking You Not Even, Like, That Long

    5 days ago5 days ago
  • Home
  • bench press

bench press

  • Uncategorized

So-Called “Gym Shark” Not So Tough Anymore After Being Decapitated by Bench Press

Nooz Staff6 years ago02 mins

TEAGLE HALL— In a swift reminder of his humanity, area fitness junkie Alvin Jung ‘21 was humbled after having his head cleanly cut off while on the bench press.  “He let his ego get the best of him,” said fellow gym-goer Eric Bilzerian, wearing an “In Memory of Alvin” sleeveless T-shirt that exposed his nipples….

Read More
You're never going to believe this but "This organization is a registered student organization of Cornell University." Newsmatic - News WordPress Theme 2026. Powered By BlazeThemes.