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May 19, 2025
  • Despotic Senior Declines to Answer Whether They’ll Seek Third Term as Club President
  • In Historic Show of Power, Student Assembly Votes to Politely Ask for More Power
  • L-DOC? My Final Essay Fucking Sucks
  • Construction Workers Declare Occupation Of Libe Slope As Clock Tower Fences Expand Into New Territory
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  • Despotic Senior Declines to Answer Whether They’ll Seek Third Term as Club President

    6 days ago6 days ago
  • In Historic Show of Power, Student Assembly Votes to Politely Ask for More Power

    7 days ago7 days ago
  • L-DOC? My Final Essay Fucking Sucks

    2 weeks ago2 weeks ago
  • Construction Workers Declare Occupation Of Libe Slope As Clock Tower Fences Expand Into New Territory

    2 weeks ago2 weeks ago
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Bitch Mom Telling Daughter to Come Home Because of Global Pandemic

Nooz Staff5 years ago5 years ago03 mins

COLLEGETOWN – Amidst growing concerns over COVID-19 and the unrest caused by the current Pandemic, Jessica Springer, ‘22, has reportedly been told to come home by her shrewish, insufferable bitch of a mother.  In the past week, the Cornell community has seen classes indefinitely suspended, events of more than fifty people banned, and at the…

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