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Wednesday, November 11, 2026
Company Named After Darth Vader’s Lightsaber Scheduled To Offer Coffee Chats on Campus
Student Wanting Lap Dance Blocks Middle Seats in Lecture
“Why Do Weed-Out Classes Even Exist?” Frowns Crabgrass-Shaped Student
Novick’s Fall Menu Still Just Muddy Puddle Water Scooped Around the Back
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Company Named After Darth Vader’s Lightsaber Scheduled To Offer Coffee Chats on Campus
Student Wanting Lap Dance Blocks Middle Seats in Lecture
“Why Do Weed-Out Classes Even Exist?” Frowns Crabgrass-Shaped Student
Novick’s Fall Menu Still Just Muddy Puddle Water Scooped Around the Back
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • CU NoozMagazine
    • Spring 2026 Issue
    • Spring 2025 Issue
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
Headlines

Company Named After Darth Vader’s Lightsaber Scheduled To Offer Coffee Chats on Campus

8 hours ago8 hours ago

Student Wanting Lap Dance Blocks Middle Seats in Lecture

1 day ago1 day ago

“Why Do Weed-Out Classes Even Exist?” Frowns Crabgrass-Shaped Student

5 days ago5 days ago

Novick’s Fall Menu Still Just Muddy Puddle Water Scooped Around the Back

6 days ago6 days ago

Report: Skepticism Up 60%?

6 days ago6 days ago

Swing Voter Would Vote Blue But Ughhh Trump Is Soooo Relatable When He Starts Going On Tangents About Men’s Bodies

1 week ago1 week ago

Aww! Rhode Island Going to Hold Cute Little Elections, Too

1 week ago1 week ago

Trump Administration Questions Whether Black Friday Got There on its Own Merit

12 months ago9 months ago

Fun Aunt Put Marshmallows in Hers

12 months ago12 months ago

“Just Happy to Help”: Dud Brother Unloads Dishwasher

12 months ago12 months ago
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OP-ED: I Sacrificed My Roommate’s Therapy Hamster to My Sneaky Link’s Therapy Cat to Appease the CourseGrab Gods

Nooz Staff5 years ago02 mins

I was sitting in my first Zoom class of the semester, blissfully chewing the singular grape I salvaged from the Toni Morisson honeydew trough, when my FWS professor asked us to debrief on the 200-page reading assignment that, quite frankly, I thought was a joke. I laughed for a moment, thinking that it would be…

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  • Uncategorized

Student Dreads Return Home to Her Fighting Hamsters Over Break

Nooz Staff9 years ago9 years ago01 mins

WESTCHESTER, NY—Freshman Jasper Griffith ‘21 would rather stay in Ithaca over break, but is instead reluctantly returning home to visit her bickering hamsters, Martha and Lance. “My house just doesn’t feel like a home anymore. It’s a cold atmosphere. Martha and Lance can’t stop fighting, and it’s ripping my family a new asshole,” said Griffith…

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