Skip to content
Wednesday, October 21, 2026
“I’ll See You In Court”: Student Mistakes CKB Resident’s Invitation As Legal Threat
Morrison Stir-Fry Station Switches to Cup & Ball Scam for Food Pickup
Cornell President Warns Replacing President Would Harm Cornell, Cornell President
Halloween Enthusiast Disappointed by Ithaca Wine & Spirits
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • CU NoozMagazine
    • Spring 2026 Issue
    • Spring 2025 Issue
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
“I’ll See You In Court”: Student Mistakes CKB Resident’s Invitation As Legal Threat
Morrison Stir-Fry Station Switches to Cup & Ball Scam for Food Pickup
Cornell President Warns Replacing President Would Harm Cornell, Cornell President
Halloween Enthusiast Disappointed by Ithaca Wine & Spirits
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • CU NoozMagazine
    • Spring 2026 Issue
    • Spring 2025 Issue
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
Headlines

“I’ll See You In Court”: Student Mistakes CKB Resident’s Invitation As Legal Threat

8 hours ago8 hours ago

Morrison Stir-Fry Station Switches to Cup & Ball Scam for Food Pickup

1 day ago1 day ago

Cornell President Warns Replacing President Would Harm Cornell, Cornell President

1 day ago1 day ago

Halloween Enthusiast Disappointed by Ithaca Wine & Spirits

5 days ago5 days ago

Throbbing Hangover Headache Met With 7:45 A.M. Clocktower Rendition of “Here Comes The Sun”

6 days ago6 days ago

“You Know, Too Much Sleep Is Actually Bad For You,” Student Tells Person-Shaped Bush

1 week ago1 week ago

“Yeah I Was in the Hood,” Says Rich White Biology Student Misleadingly Talking About Fume Hood

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

Inconsiderate Asshole With No Concept of Personal Space Sits Within 5 Seats of You in Lecture Hall

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

Inhabitants of Local Valley Starting to Regret Construction of Hole-in-the-wall Restaurant in Hydroelectric Dam

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago
matty van hooty

Tompkins County DA Relieved to Go Back to Dismissing Other Cases

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago
  • Home
  • mommy

mommy

  • Uncategorized

Cornell Announces All Log Ins Will Require a Signed Permission Form From Mommy

Nooz Staff5 years ago5 years ago02 mins

DAY HALL—In a surprise announcement by the administration this Tuesday, Cornell will  replace Duo Mobile with a permission form to take home to Mommy in its newest efforts in the war on cybercrime. “I think this new system is just lovely,” remarked Kaitlyn McCullough, mother of Xander McCullough ‘23, as she cut up a PB&J…

Read Full News
  • Uncategorized

OP-ED: Inconsiderate Asshole Is Successful When I Am Not

Nooz Staff5 years ago5 years ago02 mins

In a targeted attack to ruin my life, absolute shitstain Roger Wilhelm ‘22 continues to be successful at literally everything, while I can’t even tie my shoelaces without them coming undone five steps later.  Roger recently announced his internship at Doctors Without Borders, which he only got because his roommate’s aunt’s tennis partner-in-law worked there…

Read Full News
You're never going to believe this but "This organization is a registered student organization of Cornell University." Newsmatic - News WordPress Theme 2026. Powered By BlazeThemes.