Ornithology – CU Nooz

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Despotic Senior Declines to Answer Whether They’ll Seek Third Term as Club President
6 days ago6 days ago
In Historic Show of Power, Student Assembly Votes to Politely Ask for More Power
7 days ago7 days ago
L-DOC? My Final Essay Fucking Sucks
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Rest of Sesame Street Crew Also Forced to Live in Trash Cans After PBS Defunding
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Blood-Covered Ornithology Researcher “Sorry About the Birds”

Nooz Staff10 years ago10 years ago02 mins

SAPSUCKER WOODS — A blood-covered research assistant from Cornell’s Lab of Ornithology released a statement earlier today that he was “sorry about what happened with all the birds back there.” The researcher, biology student Robert Cowan M.S. ’18 studying changes in the behavior of the North American Goldfinch in the presence of lawnmowers, claims that…

Despotic Senior Declines to Answer Whether They’ll Seek Third Term as Club President

In Historic Show of Power, Student Assembly Votes to Politely Ask for More Power

L-DOC? My Final Essay Fucking Sucks

Construction Workers Declare Occupation Of Libe Slope As Clock Tower Fences Expand Into New Territory

Rest of Sesame Street Crew Also Forced to Live in Trash Cans After PBS Defunding

Nooz Explains: 15 Exciting Ways to Set Off the Fire Alarm at 2:30 in the Goddamn Morning

Blood-Covered Ornithology Researcher “Sorry About the Birds”