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Friday, October 16, 2026
Halloween Enthusiast Disappointed by Ithaca Wine & Spirits
Throbbing Hangover Headache Met With 7:45 A.M. Clocktower Rendition of “Here Comes The Sun”
“You Know, Too Much Sleep Is Actually Bad For You,” Student Tells Person-Shaped Bush
“Yeah I Was in the Hood,” Says Rich White Biology Student Misleadingly Talking About Fume Hood
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Halloween Enthusiast Disappointed by Ithaca Wine & Spirits
Throbbing Hangover Headache Met With 7:45 A.M. Clocktower Rendition of “Here Comes The Sun”
“You Know, Too Much Sleep Is Actually Bad For You,” Student Tells Person-Shaped Bush
“Yeah I Was in the Hood,” Says Rich White Biology Student Misleadingly Talking About Fume Hood
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • CU NoozMagazine
    • Spring 2026 Issue
    • Spring 2025 Issue
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
Headlines

Halloween Enthusiast Disappointed by Ithaca Wine & Spirits

4 hours ago4 hours ago

Throbbing Hangover Headache Met With 7:45 A.M. Clocktower Rendition of “Here Comes The Sun”

1 day ago1 day ago

“You Know, Too Much Sleep Is Actually Bad For You,” Student Tells Person-Shaped Bush

2 days ago2 days ago

“Yeah I Was in the Hood,” Says Rich White Biology Student Misleadingly Talking About Fume Hood

1 week ago1 week ago

Inconsiderate Asshole With No Concept of Personal Space Sits Within 5 Seats of You in Lecture Hall

1 week ago1 week ago

Inhabitants of Local Valley Starting to Regret Construction of Hole-in-the-wall Restaurant in Hydroelectric Dam

1 week ago1 week ago
matty van hooty

Tompkins County DA Relieved to Go Back to Dismissing Other Cases

1 week ago1 week ago

Kotlikoff Also Wondering What Action Cornell Administration Will Take

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

Splitsies! Group Assignment Done By Just You

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

CUPD Claims K-9 Ate Report

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago
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  • Phlegm

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Cornell Health Boasts Selective 2% Acceptance Rate for 2025 Appointment Cycle

Nooz Staff1 year ago02 mins

CORNELL HEALTH—A proud newly accepted class of 15 lucky Cornell students have been selected to fill all available appointment slots this semester. Cornell Health released statistics about their incoming class: “The average stab wound of an accepted patient came in at an impressive 12 inches long, most students filled out their forms in less than…

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