Saturday, October 10, 2026
“Yeah I Was in the Hood,” Says Rich White Biology Student Misleadingly Talking About Fume Hood
Inconsiderate Asshole With No Concept of Personal Space Sits Within 5 Seats of You in Lecture Hall
Inhabitants of Local Valley Starting to Regret Construction of Hole-in-the-wall Restaurant in Hydroelectric Dam
Tompkins County DA Relieved to Go Back to Dismissing Other Cases

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
“Yeah I Was in the Hood,” Says Rich White Biology Student Misleadingly Talking About Fume Hood
Inconsiderate Asshole With No Concept of Personal Space Sits Within 5 Seats of You in Lecture Hall
Inhabitants of Local Valley Starting to Regret Construction of Hole-in-the-wall Restaurant in Hydroelectric Dam
Tompkins County DA Relieved to Go Back to Dismissing Other Cases

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
Headlines

“Yeah I Was in the Hood,” Says Rich White Biology Student Misleadingly Talking About Fume Hood

Inconsiderate Asshole With No Concept of Personal Space Sits Within 5 Seats of You in Lecture Hall

Inhabitants of Local Valley Starting to Regret Construction of Hole-in-the-wall Restaurant in Hydroelectric Dam

matty van hooty

Tompkins County DA Relieved to Go Back to Dismissing Other Cases

Kotlikoff Also Wondering What Action Cornell Administration Will Take

Splitsies! Group Assignment Done By Just You

CUPD Claims K-9 Ate Report

Biology Major Stressed About Answers to Pre-Limbs 

Only Minority in Friend Group Already Knows Who She Going to Be

Ambitious Group Project Member Needs To Take The Fucking Hint

politics

Photo credit: Annie Wang/Sun File Photo via Cornell Daily Sun
Photo credit: Annie Wang/Sun File Photo via Cornell Daily Sun

SA Elections Rocked by Controversy in Transparent Attempt to Emulate Real-Life Democracy

Nooz Staff02 mins

WILLARD STRAIGHT HALL—While some attribute the mismanaged Student Assembly election and subsequent re-vote to sheer ineptitude, many critics have identified the undergraduate governing body’s utter ballot-bungling as an attempt to replicate the workings of real-life democracy. In a nine-paragraph essay published to the Cornell Subreddit, election-truther George Blast ‘21 levied pointed accusations against the Assembly….

Read Full News

OP-ED: I Should’ve Checked My Friend Wasn’t Conservative Before Making Her Register to Vote

Nooz Staff02 mins

GOLDWIN SMITH HALL — With the midterm elections fast approaching, I took it upon myself, as an informed citizen and registered voter, to encourage my friends to register as well. Unfortunately, my well-intentioned plan to increase youth turnout this November backfired when I accidentally convinced my friend Janice to register without realizing she was actually…

Read Full News

Rick Santorum to Announce 2020 Presidential Campaign Suspension at Cornell

Nooz Staff01 mins

STATLER AUDITORIUM — Speaking to the Cornell community later today, conservative politician Rick Santorum is expected to announce that he is immediately halting his 2020 campaign for President of the United States. Santorum’s announcement will follow a long, distinguished career of failed presidential campaigns. “Before this upcoming election cycle, I thought that my 2016 campaign…

Read Full News