Squirrels – CU Nooz

Headlines

Catch Me If You Can! CUPD Seen Sledding Down Slope in Pursuit of Evil Students Vandalizing Libe Slope with Evil Sleds
5 days ago5 days ago
Angsty Student Body Clearly Has Study Period
6 days ago6 days ago
Olin Elevator Dead at Level B
1 week ago1 week ago
Partisan Gerrymandering Threatens to Remove 15 Seats from Uris Library
1 week ago1 week ago
Fatass Inducted Into Dining Hall of Fame
2 weeks ago2 weeks ago
Willard Straight Hall Turns 100, Runs for Congress
2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

Campus Squirrel Contemplates Digging 1,500 Small Holes

Nooz Staff9 years ago01 mins

TOWER ROAD — Speedily rubbing its paws together and darting its tail this way and that, an indecisive campus squirrel reportedly contemplated whether or not to dig over one thousand small holes in the ground. “Those woodchips over there look pretty easy to move around. I could probably dig a few holes by that tree…

Squirrel Watching Club Neglects Duties as Squirrels Rampage Through Campus

Nooz Staff10 years ago02 mins

HO PLAZA — The Cornell campus was on high alert at 11 p.m. last night when a horde of squirrels went into a frenzy through campus after the Squirrel Watching Club neglected its duties during finals week to watch squirrels for radical behavior. “We acknowledge our shortcomings, and we apologize,” said Elizabeth Harvey ’16, president…