Skip to content
April 22, 2026
  • University Report Finds Students Need to Be Better Supported, but Ugh, It So Much Work Though
  • E&S Major Using ChatGPT Calls It Even
  • Harry Potter Ass Motherfucker Studying Under Olin Stairs
  • Aww! Daily Sun Wants to Be Just Like Favorite Satire Publication When They Grow Up
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
  • CU NoozMagazine | Spring 2025 Issue
Headlines
  • University Report Finds Students Need to Be Better Supported, but Ugh, It So Much Work Though

    4 hours ago4 hours ago
  • E&S Major Using ChatGPT Calls It Even

    6 hours ago6 hours ago
  • Harry Potter Ass Motherfucker Studying Under Olin Stairs

    1 day ago1 day ago
  • Aww! Daily Sun Wants to Be Just Like Favorite Satire Publication When They Grow Up

    1 day ago1 day ago
  • Ty Dolla $ign Still Waiting for OurBus Back From Syracuse Airport

    2 days ago2 days ago
  • Kotlikoff Sowwy For Washing Away Political Chalk Messages, Just Wanted To Play Hopscotch

    2 days ago2 days ago
  • Home
  • zoner

zoner

  • Uncategorized

Disarmed Kathy Zoner Uses Rope & Lasso to Wrangle In Naughty Boys

Nooz Staff5 years ago02 mins

ARTS QUAD—Following the passage of Student Assembly’s CUPD disarmament resolution, out-of-retirement Police Chief Kathy Zoner was spotted responsibly locking away her firearm before holstering 10 feet of rope and taking to the streets on horseback. “Her stallion was galloping alongside a speeding car on East Ave. She lassoed its tailpipe and pulled it into the…

Read More
You're never going to believe this but "This organization is a registered student organization of Cornell University." Newsmatic - News WordPress Theme 2026. Powered By BlazeThemes.