Skip to content
November 25, 2025
  • “Quiet, Piggy!”: Donald Trump Denounces Consumption of Pork in Attempt to Impress Zohran Mamdani
  • Trump: ABC Reporter Lucky She Not Sawed Up in Saudi Embassy
  • Cornell Daily Sun Renamed Cornell Daily Rain Sleet Hail Snow
  • Report: Syracuse Airport Has City, Too
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
  • CU NoozMagazine | Spring 2025 Issue
Headlines
  • “Quiet, Piggy!”: Donald Trump Denounces Consumption of Pork in Attempt to Impress Zohran Mamdani

    4 hours ago4 hours ago
  • Trump: ABC Reporter Lucky She Not Sawed Up in Saudi Embassy

    1 day ago1 day ago
  • Cornell Daily Sun Renamed Cornell Daily Rain Sleet Hail Snow

    4 days ago4 days ago
  • Report: Syracuse Airport Has City, Too

    5 days ago5 days ago
  • Wings Over Ithaca Competitor “Wings Over Crete” Sees Sharp Plummet in Sales

    6 days ago6 days ago
  • Kotlikoff Not Sure This Best Time To Redeem Newly Acquired Mar-A-Lago Flight Voucher

    1 week ago1 week ago
  • Home
  • 2014
  • April
  • 15

April 15, 2014

  • Cornell

“What The Fuck” Forecasted for This Week

Nooz Staff12 years ago12 years ago01 mins

The National Weather Service has issued a severe weather warning to residents of Tompkins county due to high chances of what the fuck. Meteorologists say that during the coming days there is an 80% chance of bullshit, with a strong god dammit coming from the north at 12 mph. Temperatures will drop as low as…

Read More
  • Cornell

Study: Ho Plaza Eye Contact Found to Be Deadly

Nooz Staff12 years ago12 years ago02 mins

ITHACA, NY – In a cross-department study performed by sociology professor Howard Lipton and tenured biology researcher Dr. Mangold Biggins, the longstanding Cornell practice of making eye contact on Ho Plaza has been deemed a certain cause of death. According to Lipton and Biggins, the human body goes into immediate cardiac arrest when even a…

Read More
You're never going to believe this but "This organization is a registered student organization of Cornell University." Newsmatic - News WordPress Theme 2025. Powered By BlazeThemes.