Skip to content
January 31, 2026
  • Cornell Engineering Debuts ‘This Is What A David Duffield Looks Like’ Shirt
  • Puffer Jacket in Heels Excited to Hit the Town
  • Everyone at Ithaca REI Dressed Like Employee
  • Chuck Schumer Vows to Stand Up to Republicans Until It Time to Take Nap
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
  • CU NoozMagazine | Spring 2025 Issue
Headlines
  • Cornell Engineering Debuts ‘This Is What A David Duffield Looks Like’ Shirt

    18 hours ago18 hours ago
  • Puffer Jacket in Heels Excited to Hit the Town

    21 hours ago21 hours ago
  • Everyone at Ithaca REI Dressed Like Employee

    2 days ago2 days ago
  • Chuck Schumer Vows to Stand Up to Republicans Until It Time to Take Nap

    2 days ago2 days ago
  • Minnesota Democrats Vow to Send Trump Sternly-Worded Edible Arrangement Next Time ICE Murders One of Their Constituents

    3 days ago3 days ago
  • College of Human Ecology to Remain Unnamed Despite Generous Donation from Adam Hitler ’73

    4 days ago4 days ago
  • Home
  • 2014
  • April
  • 16

April 16, 2014

  • Cornell

Varsity Hockey Player Pre-Enrolls in Straight A’s

Nooz Staff12 years ago12 years ago03 mins

ITHACA- Following his completion of pre-enroll, varsity hockey player Tucker Maclin ’15, announced his excitement at the fact that next semester he will, like all previous semesters, be receiving a 4.0 GPA . This incredible feat will be accomplished while taking a substantial 18 credits, only having classes on Wednesdays, and with the stipulation that…

Read More
  • Cornell

Happy Dave Transcends Into Higher Plane of Existence

Nooz Staff12 years ago12 years ago02 mins

Cornell Dining announced earlier today that Okenshields greeter David Sepulveda, commonly known as “Happy Dave,” has elevated into a higher level of being. Having been happy for so long, he has developed an understanding of the universe incomprehensible to other humans. As a result, he has transformed into a creature of the higher dimensions. “Dave…

Read More
You're never going to believe this but "This organization is a registered student organization of Cornell University." Newsmatic - News WordPress Theme 2026. Powered By BlazeThemes.