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Biology Major Stressed About Answers to Pre-Limbs 
Student Who Chose Cornell For Top 12 Ranking Forced to Transfer
Your Friend Who Happens to Have a Car is Actually Funniest, Coolest, Most Attractive Person Ever
Kotlikoff Frustrated by Inability to Send Nationwide Email
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Biology Major Stressed About Answers to Pre-Limbs 
Student Who Chose Cornell For Top 12 Ranking Forced to Transfer
Your Friend Who Happens to Have a Car is Actually Funniest, Coolest, Most Attractive Person Ever
Kotlikoff Frustrated by Inability to Send Nationwide Email
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • CU NoozMagazine
    • Spring 2026 Issue
    • Spring 2025 Issue
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
Headlines

Biology Major Stressed About Answers to Pre-Limbs 

4 hours ago4 hours ago

Only Minority in Friend Group Already Knows Who She Going to Be

11 months ago11 months ago

Ambitious Group Project Member Needs To Take The Fucking Hint

11 months ago11 months ago

Motivational Message Etched Into Library Desk Undermined By Penis Right Beneath It

11 months ago11 months ago

Polycule Sex Cult Still Calling Itself “Co-Op”

11 months ago11 months ago

Cornell Announces “Raw Chicken Wednesdays” to Slim Down Large Freshman Class

11 months ago11 months ago

Americans Defeat Fascism by Putting On Greatest Talent Show This Nation Has Ever Seen

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Mamdani Debates Cuomo As World War I Flying Ace Curtis Sliwa Dogfights Infamous Red Baron

12 months ago

Pre-Annotated Library Book Tells Student Exactly What Important

12 months ago7 months ago

Professor Getting All Excited About Life’s Work Again

12 months ago12 months ago
  • Home
  • 2014
  • October
  • 27

October 27, 2014

  • Cornell

“I Hate Appel’s Dinner” Says Freshman Who Will Live on Cold Hot Dogs in 2 Years

Nooz Staff12 years ago01 mins

ITHACA, NY — Witnesses report hearing Mac Davis, a Freshman who will eat nothing but cold hot dogs in two years’ time, complain about the quality of food at the Appel Dining Hall. “Everything’s just so boring,” Davis said, “They have the same dishes, like, every week. Blah.” Davis resigned himself to making a “totally…

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  • Uncategorized

Students Organize Carwash to Support Suffering Residents of High and Low Rise Community

Nooz Staff12 years ago11 years ago02 mins

SKYBRIDGE: Residents of Court, Kay, Bauer, and Mews Halls announced this morning plans for a charity carwash to raise money for residents of the High and Low Rise residence halls. “We are all Cornellians. To see members of our family suffering in the slums of North Campus is heartbreaking. Now it’s our time to show…

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