October 30, 2014

Anonymous Rascal Puts Severed Head on Top of Clock Tower

Nooz Staff12 years ago02 mins

MCGRAW TOWER — The Cornell community was taken by surprise this morning to find that some lighthearted prankster managed to place a severed head on the top of Cornell’s iconic McGraw Clock Tower. “That head really spooked us for a moment there, but we know it’s all in good fun!” said CUPD chief Kathy Zoner on…

Svante Myrick Cancels Day of Meetings to Sew Halloween Costume With Mom

Nooz Staff12 years ago02 mins

ITHACA TOWN HALL — Early this morning, Ithaca mayor Svante Myrick announced that he would be canceling all of his scheduled meetings in favor of sewing the finishing touches onto his halloween costume with his mom. “I’m gonna be a race car driver!” said an excited Myrick as he and his mother gathered up a…

Nest-less Campus Birds Seen Eagerly Eyeing Boris Johnson’s Hair

Last Remaining Senior Days Event Just Bottle of Liquor in Paper Bag

New Food Truck Fills Midnight Raw Fish Niche in Collegetown Restaurant Scene

Dim-Witted Bird Chooses Uris Hall as Nesting Site Instead of Beautiful, Flowering Tree

University Report Finds Students Need to Be Better Supported, but Ugh, It So Much Work Though

E&S Major Using ChatGPT Calls It Even

October 30, 2014

Anonymous Rascal Puts Severed Head on Top of Clock Tower

Svante Myrick Cancels Day of Meetings to Sew Halloween Costume With Mom