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February 24, 2026
  • Student Assembly Threatens Competence
  • “Unfortunately, We Had Many Qualified Candidates,” Sings A Capella Group At 2am Outside Your Window
  • Coefficient of Kinetic Friction Between You and Gray Slush Says Eat Shit Nerd
  • Bing Chilling? February Break Spent Celebrating Chinese New Year In Auspicious Binghamton Getaway
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April 5, 2023

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Death Of The First Born? Younger Brother Going To Yale

Nooz Staff3 years ago3 years ago03 mins

TENAFLY, NEW JERSEY—Visiting home for a seemingly uneventful Seder, Dan Waxman ‘25 found himself effectively slain in the minds of his entire extended family after his younger brother was accepted into the far more prestigious Yale University. “I feel like a ghost,” complained a saddened Waxman. “Last year I was ‘Mr. Ivy League,’ but now…

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