Skip to content
Thursday, October 8, 2026
Inhabitants of Local Valley Starting to Regret Construction of Hole-in-the-wall Restaurant in Hydroelectric Dam
Tompkins County DA Relieved to Go Back to Dismissing Other Cases
Kotlikoff Also Wondering What Action Cornell Administration Will Take
Splitsies! Group Assignment Done By Just You
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • CU NoozMagazine
    • Spring 2026 Issue
    • Spring 2025 Issue
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
Inhabitants of Local Valley Starting to Regret Construction of Hole-in-the-wall Restaurant in Hydroelectric Dam
Tompkins County DA Relieved to Go Back to Dismissing Other Cases
Kotlikoff Also Wondering What Action Cornell Administration Will Take
Splitsies! Group Assignment Done By Just You
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • CU NoozMagazine
    • Spring 2026 Issue
    • Spring 2025 Issue
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
Headlines

Inhabitants of Local Valley Starting to Regret Construction of Hole-in-the-wall Restaurant in Hydroelectric Dam

16 hours ago16 hours ago
matty van hooty

Tompkins County DA Relieved to Go Back to Dismissing Other Cases

2 days ago2 days ago

Kotlikoff Also Wondering What Action Cornell Administration Will Take

2 days ago2 days ago

Splitsies! Group Assignment Done By Just You

6 days ago6 days ago

CUPD Claims K-9 Ate Report

6 days ago6 days ago

Biology Major Stressed About Answers to Pre-Limbs 

7 days ago7 days ago

Only Minority in Friend Group Already Knows Who She Going to Be

11 months ago11 months ago

Ambitious Group Project Member Needs To Take The Fucking Hint

11 months ago11 months ago

Motivational Message Etched Into Library Desk Undermined By Penis Right Beneath It

11 months ago11 months ago

Polycule Sex Cult Still Calling Itself “Co-Op”

12 months ago12 months ago
  • Home
  • Breaks

Breaks

  • Uncategorized

Martha Pollack Clarifies Fall Break Only Meant for Haircuts

Nooz Staff7 years ago01 mins

DAY HALL—In a Friday morning press conference, University President Martha Pollack addressed the student body to reaffirm that the intended purpose of Fall Break is for students to go back home to get a haircut. “I’ve overheard students discussing plans to take trips to Montréal, visit friends at other colleges, or stay on campus to…

Read Full News
  • Cornell

CU Nooz’s List of Best Spring Break Destinations and Best Places to Escape Your Past

Nooz Staff12 years ago02 mins

With Spring break coming up next week, let’s take a look at the best places to vacation with your friends. Or, if you’re trying to escape your troubled past at all costs, we included some places that are good for that, too. Cancun, Mexico – With miles of gorgeous beaches, stunning scenery, and friendly locals,…

Read Full News
  • Uncategorized

Intolerable Parents Paying Entire Tuition

Nooz Staff12 years ago12 years ago01 mins

LATHAM, MA – After several days at home for break, Cornell sophomore Tina Nelson has determined that her parents, who are paying for her entire college tuition, are utterly and totally unbearable. “Mom never shuts up about her yoga class, and Dad doesn’t know how to work any piece of technology and has to ask…

Read Full News
  • Cornell

Students Return to Desperately Clawing for Another Break

Nooz Staff12 years ago02 mins

ITHACA — Thousands of Cornell students returned to campus this week to begin their Spring semester classes and to rekindle their undying impatience for a recess from school. After the month-long Winter break, students are feeling reinvigorated for the new semester’s soul-sucking agony between periods of academic inactivity. “It’s great to be back on campus!”…

Read Full News
  • Cornell

Freshmen Definitely Enjoyed Staying on Campus for Thanksgiving

Nooz Staff12 years ago01 mins

MARY DONLON HALL—While the vast majority of students visited home over Thanksgiving Break, reports confirm that Brian O’Connor (ILR ’18) had a great time staying in his quiet, lonely dorm the past five days. “It probably would’ve been really really nice spend time with my parents, or my dog, or my girlfriend of three years….

Read Full News
You're never going to believe this but "This organization is a registered student organization of Cornell University." Newsmatic - News WordPress Theme 2026. Powered By BlazeThemes.