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Company Named After Darth Vader’s Lightsaber Scheduled To Offer Coffee Chats on Campus
Student Wanting Lap Dance Blocks Middle Seats in Lecture
“Why Do Weed-Out Classes Even Exist?” Frowns Crabgrass-Shaped Student
Novick’s Fall Menu Still Just Muddy Puddle Water Scooped Around the Back
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Company Named After Darth Vader’s Lightsaber Scheduled To Offer Coffee Chats on Campus
Student Wanting Lap Dance Blocks Middle Seats in Lecture
“Why Do Weed-Out Classes Even Exist?” Frowns Crabgrass-Shaped Student
Novick’s Fall Menu Still Just Muddy Puddle Water Scooped Around the Back
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • CU NoozMagazine
    • Spring 2026 Issue
    • Spring 2025 Issue
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
Headlines

Company Named After Darth Vader’s Lightsaber Scheduled To Offer Coffee Chats on Campus

9 hours ago9 hours ago

Student Wanting Lap Dance Blocks Middle Seats in Lecture

1 day ago1 day ago

“Why Do Weed-Out Classes Even Exist?” Frowns Crabgrass-Shaped Student

5 days ago5 days ago

Novick’s Fall Menu Still Just Muddy Puddle Water Scooped Around the Back

6 days ago6 days ago

Report: Skepticism Up 60%?

6 days ago6 days ago

Swing Voter Would Vote Blue But Ughhh Trump Is Soooo Relatable When He Starts Going On Tangents About Men’s Bodies

1 week ago1 week ago

Aww! Rhode Island Going to Hold Cute Little Elections, Too

1 week ago1 week ago

Trump Administration Questions Whether Black Friday Got There on its Own Merit

12 months ago9 months ago

Fun Aunt Put Marshmallows in Hers

12 months ago12 months ago

“Just Happy to Help”: Dud Brother Unloads Dishwasher

12 months ago12 months ago
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OP-ED: And I Would’ve Gotten Away With It Too If It Weren’t for Those Darn Research Ethics

Nooz Staff8 years ago8 years ago01 mins

By Former Professor Brian Wansink After years of being a legendary celebrity in the world of food science research, I was still at the top of my game here at Cornell, basking in the glory of my decades of hard work. Sure, I fudged a few numbers here and there, and may or may not…

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Food Science Major Desperately Looking For New Thing To Milk

Nooz Staff9 years ago01 mins

In an attempt to find the next big viscous drink craze for his thesis, Cornell Food Science major Todd Carmichael ‘18 has been desperately looking for a new thing to milk. “I mean, people have been milking cows, goats, even various nuts. There’s not many things left for a guy like me to milk around…

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Food Science Professor Celebrated For Finally Defining “Savory”

Nooz Staff9 years ago01 mins

STOCKING HALL— Earlier this week, Food Science Professor Rick Touche was lauded for finally nailing down the definition of the word “savory.” This breakthrough was met with relief from billions of food eaters across the globe who have long struggled to explain what they’re tasting. “His definition is ingenious: broad, but not too broad. Specific,…

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