Food

Line for Dumpster Behind Terrace Too Long for Local Raccoons

Nooz Staff10 years ago10 years ago02 mins

STATLER DRIVE — As the lunch rush peaked at the dumpster behind the Statler Hotel, dozens of local raccoons decided the long lines for wasted food from the Terrace Restaurant have become too long to put up with. “It’s ridiculous how many animals are trying to dig into the Terrace garbage,” commented Robbie Raccoon, who…

Local Girl Scout Militia To Enforce Fascist Agenda On Ho Plaza

Nooz Staff10 years ago10 years ago02 mins

HO PLAZA, BASE OF OPERATIONS – The Ithaca sector of the Girl Scouts of America have entered the next phase of their campus infiltration, as dozens of six-year-olds and their parents enforce their confection-based fascist agenda outside of Willard Straight Hall. “These freethinkers will pay for not accepting our cookies as mandated by the constitution…

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Line for Dumpster Behind Terrace Too Long for Local Raccoons

Local Girl Scout Militia To Enforce Fascist Agenda On Ho Plaza