Skip to content
January 31, 2026
  • Cornell Engineering Debuts ‘This Is What A David Duffield Looks Like’ Shirt
  • Puffer Jacket in Heels Excited to Hit the Town
  • Everyone at Ithaca REI Dressed Like Employee
  • Chuck Schumer Vows to Stand Up to Republicans Until It Time to Take Nap
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
  • CU NoozMagazine | Spring 2025 Issue
Headlines
  • Cornell Engineering Debuts ‘This Is What A David Duffield Looks Like’ Shirt

    20 hours ago20 hours ago
  • Puffer Jacket in Heels Excited to Hit the Town

    23 hours ago23 hours ago
  • Everyone at Ithaca REI Dressed Like Employee

    2 days ago2 days ago
  • Chuck Schumer Vows to Stand Up to Republicans Until It Time to Take Nap

    2 days ago2 days ago
  • Minnesota Democrats Vow to Send Trump Sternly-Worded Edible Arrangement Next Time ICE Murders One of Their Constituents

    3 days ago3 days ago
  • College of Human Ecology to Remain Unnamed Despite Generous Donation from Adam Hitler ’73

    4 days ago4 days ago
  • Home
  • move-in

move-in

  • Uncategorized

“This Hotel Is Almost as Nice as the Ones You’ll Inherit,” Says Hotelie Mother Visiting Statler

Nooz Staff3 years ago3 years ago02 mins

After lodging in the Stater Hotel during move-in, Dr. Justine Quality-Inn Ph.D. ’94, mother of Alex Quality-Inn ’24, informed her daughter that the hotel was “not bad for Upstate,” but was no match for the hotels Alex will one day inherit. “This is fine, I guess,” says Alex. “My mom told me I should expect…

Read More
  • Uncategorized

11th Plague of Egypt Descends Upon Command Strip Section of Bed Bath & Beyond

Nooz Staff6 years ago02 mins

BED BATH AND BEYOND—Ithaca’s own Bed Bath & Beyond was struck this past week by a new, never-before-seen curse from the heavens above. This eleventh plague wreaked havoc on the aisles dedicated to command strips as well as their off-brand alternatives. “It was horrifying, I’d never seen anything like it,” said Cashier Josephine Selter  “So…

Read More
  • Uncategorized

Incoming Freshman Lays Out Outfits For Every Day of First Year

Nooz Staff8 years ago02 mins

MADISON, WI—After emptying her closets and pulling out suitcases in preparation for move-in day, incoming freshman Becca Miller laid out outfits on her bed for every day of her first year at Cornell. “I know I’ll have so many other things on my mind, like moving into my dorm, figuring out where my classes are,…

Read More
  • Uncategorized

OP-ED: Will You Be My Best Friend for the Next Four Years?

Nooz Staff9 years ago9 years ago04 mins

By an incoming freshman Hey guys! My name is Owen and I’m in the Cornell University Class of 2021! Just thought I’d introduce myself before move-in. I’m hoping to make a new friend or two, or maybe actually find my best friend who will stick with me for the next four years and then for…

Read More
You're never going to believe this but "This organization is a registered student organization of Cornell University." Newsmatic - News WordPress Theme 2026. Powered By BlazeThemes.