COLLEGETOWN—Ithaca winter weather brings plummeting temperatures and gale-force winds, making a meager 32 degrees feel like sub-zero. The temperature alone is enough to dishearten even the most ardent winter enthusiasts. However, there is but one force stronger than the most biting chill of a Cornell February, inextinguishable by the elements, that scarcely dims in the…
COLLEGE OF VETERINARY MEDICINE—Students were able to get their seasonal flu shots free of charge this year at a variety of sites on campus. Unfortunately, it seems like some individuals who received their vaccine at the College of Veterinary Medicine are suffering from an unintended side effect: neighing like a horse on anabolic steroids. Carlton…
LAKE PLACID, NY – Despite a rough three periods so far for the Cornell Men’s Hockey team in tonight’s ECAC Hockey Final against Harvard, some students have remained optimistic of a victorious outcome, as the Big Red are only down by three goals entering the fourth quarter. “Three points may seem like a lot, but…
COLLEGETOWN—Hungry after a long day of exploring his future campus, incoming engineer Julio Saldanha ‘23 was captivated by Collegetown’s choice of dining options that will surely shut down before the fall semester. “All these restaurants look so good, but I think I’m going to spend a lot of time at Calios these next four years,”…
Ted Donato, head coach of the Harvard Men’s Ice Hockey team, has threatened to cut off funding to ECAC, thereby shutting the entire organization down, unless 11 additional historical wins against Cornell are added to Harvard’s record. Such a move would tip Harvard’s total wins over the past 104 years above Cornell’s. “We have tried,…
STEWART AVE—The many responsibilities of a frat brother can be difficult to juggle. Managing throwing parties, violently hazing freshmen, and covering up said hazing all at once is a tough ask. So when pledge brother Austin Anders ‘26 was put on door duty for Alpha Pi Ro Kappa Delta Gamma’s Halloween party, mistakes–such as welcoming…
THE HEAVENS – As Cornell struggles through one of the coldest stretches in recent memory, local reports indicate that even the Lord Almighty himself is wondering when this intolerable weather will let up. “It feels like it’s been under 10 degrees this whole semester, and classes haven’t even been canceled yet? I mean what are…
Formal sorority recruitment provides freshmen girls with the opportunity to find the house that fits them best. Girls visit every sorority and their choices narrow down as the week goes on through a combination of their selections and those of the sorority sisters. This guide will help maximize your preparation for the week ahead. Choosing…
BAKER LAB- As Mrs. Winkler entered the auditorium full of eager CHEM 2070 students, she was met with concerned whispers from the crowd. The 300 murmuring students were silenced only when one of them dared to blurt out the question on everyone’s mind. “Where’s Mr. Zax today? and who are you?” exclaimed brave freshman Eric…
Hey queen! Can we have a little chat, just you and me? I am coming to you as a nameless, faceless concerned individual who is definitely not your best friend because nothing else seems to be getting through to you up to this point. I know the pandemic has been tough on all of us,…
