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March 13, 2026
  • Wikipedia Page of Esteemed Professor Currently Flunking You Not Even, Like, That Long
  • “These Hands Don’t Haze!” Says Frat President Who Used Legs to Kick Shit Out of Pledges
  • Half-Assed Discussion Post Setting Dangerous Precedent For Rest of Semester
  • Local Jester Actually Prefers Fool’s Spring
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  • Wikipedia Page of Esteemed Professor Currently Flunking You Not Even, Like, That Long

    18 hours ago18 hours ago
  • “These Hands Don’t Haze!” Says Frat President Who Used Legs to Kick Shit Out of Pledges

    19 hours ago19 hours ago
  • Half-Assed Discussion Post Setting Dangerous Precedent For Rest of Semester

    2 days ago2 days ago
  • Local Jester Actually Prefers Fool’s Spring

    3 days ago3 days ago
  • Frolicking Squirrel Thinks It’s Funny You Bombed That Prelim

    3 days ago3 days ago
  • Dumb Idiot Bunny Rabbit Doesn’t Know It About to Get Cold Again

    4 days ago4 days ago
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Stickless Big Round Puck Hockey Team Wins Match

Nooz Staff2 years ago2 years ago02 mins

BARTELS RINK—Enthusiastic and slightly confused Cornell sports fans packed the stands this past weekend at what some called “the strangest hockey game ever.” “I’d never seen anything like it,” shared Connel McMillen ‘25. “The ice rink was rectangular and the players didn’t have hockey sticks. The puck was round and orange and they sort of…

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“Uppies?” Lightweight Wrestling Team Member Desires to Dunk a Basketball

Nooz Staff3 years ago3 years ago04 mins

HELEN NEWMAN BASKETBALL COURT–Johnathan Cool ‘24 has been an NCAA champion wrestler for 2 years and counting, and was set to make another run at the title this upcoming year, where he was sure to make a splash in the tournament. His coaches and admirers had been expecting his grand return, when he suddenly came…

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