GANĘDAGǪ HALL— Hannah Gordon ‘29 awoke the morning after hooking up with a mutual she met at her friend’s party. As she rubbed her eyes and adjusted her vision to the cold light of day, she was met with the sight of her spooky season suitor awkwardly squeezing himself back into the hot dog garb she apparently found attractive the night before.
“Oh, hey uh, good morning,” said Frank Walker ‘29 as the polyester velour of the hot dog costume hung awkwardly around his knees. “I have to get going but I didn’t want to wake you…I, uh, had a lot of fun last night.”
Hugging goodbye, Gordon smelled the aphrodisiacal combination of beer, vodka, and body odor. “It was just weird he wanted to exit wearing the hot dog costume instead of just holding it. He was very much wearing clothes underneath the suit,” Gordon remarked.
After making a horribly off-color pun about wieners, Walker did a final once-over of himself in the mirror, adjusted the suit slightly, and started off on his journey. He was not going back home, but rather, in his words, had some “business” to attend to.
Walker left and later texted Gordon about the possibility of seeing her around at that night’s festivities. His full-scale Jabba the Hutt costume was going to be “off the chain.”
